I've been banished (I hope only temporarily...)I THOUGHT I was being a good vampire. But apparently my tall, handsome, brooding, bloodthirsty presence alone is enough to scare the *&%$#!%$%* bejesus out of Val when she comes up to the third floor to quilt. Is it MY fault I am left alone all day and just want some company? I haven't been to a playdate or a party in WEEKS. It's not like I bit her or anything. I didn't even nip her! Oh Christ, NOW I sound like the dog. What's next, the shelter? From the corner to the shelter? Have I NO dignity left?
Edward...you can come to my place anytime. *I* have a nice, soft bed waiting for you...
ReplyDelete..and she stood you right where you have to look at her wedding photo all the time!
ReplyDeleteIs it terrible that Alice has seen Twilight? Our college kid neighbor thought that it would be great to share it with her! There was some editing, but sheesh...Do I have to share ALL my mommy porn...
ReplyDeleteD - he's just reminiscing about how I smell like SAUSAGE.
ReplyDelete