"I’d forgotten how exuberant you are." - Alice, New Moon, ch. 17, p.383

These women are seriously DISTURBED.
They made me wear a birthday crown.
They thought it was CUTE.
I may be 108 (in vampire years), which is pretty darn impressive, but this is a bit much.

Plus, have you noticed Paula's red eyes? Methinks she is NOT a vegetarian after all. AHEM.

"I was rather under the impression that you’d promised to ask my permission to go to some kind of werewolf soirée tonight."

Look at this spread. Shame VAMPIRES CAN'T EAT.

Also, where's my birthday cake? I know I don't eat, but really, what's a party without cake? Bella-flavored cake.

"Bella, the last real birthday any of us had was Emmett in 1935. " - Edward, New Moon, ch. 1, p.23

Happy 17th, Edward!
[Erm, happy 23rd, RPatz!]

"So, yeah, I turned seventeen again. Big deal. But these lovely ladies threw me a party. Wanna know what we did? Bet you can guess...and get your mind out of the gutter, for God's sake, I'm CARDBOARD."

"And I knew I couldn’t ignore you any longer." - Edward, Twilight, ch. 14, p. 303

"Well, helllloooooooooo, Mrs. Robinson..."

"Go sit down and look pale." - Edward, Twilight, ch. 5, p.101

My dear Amy, I am so sorry you're sick. If it makes you feel any better, I am not going to playgroup either. All those delicious children at the Toy Lending Library would be just too tempting. Plus, it's raining again.

And Paula, love, welcome home from Jamaica. I missed you. (And you can tell your friend Matt that we don't NEED to shower; vampires don't stink. Ever.)

(Also, remember all those ads in the 80s? "Come back to Jamaica..."? Bad vampires. We Cullens kicked their butts, and now Jamaica is safe for the lovely likes of you (and that human husband of yours.)) I hope you had a lovely time.

"Do I dazzle you?" Edward, Twilight, ch. 8, p.168

"Maybe...he's...not so...awful, after all. And...he DOES...smell pretty good."
"Also? We have matching eyebrows."

"I asked Jane to do that to me once—just out of curiosity." - Aro, New Moon, ch. 21 p. 476

"You call THAT a magic wand?"